December has also had a lot of meaning for me in the recent past. December 2nd, last Thursday, was the 3 year anniversary of a very difficult family tragedy, one that necessitated me flying home from my full-time mission for a brief period (I was home for something like 33 hours), which is tremendously unusual. That was '07, for those of you who don't want to do the math. I was serving in Appleton, Wisconsin and really got thrown for a loop. I was four months into my mission and was enjoying a new area with wonderful people, and this tossed me into an emotional blankness or something. I don't really know, I just wasn't myself for a few months. It wasn't an easy month for me or my family.
Skip forward a year. December of '08 was very different. I was serving with Jerry Lo in central Wisconsin in a city called Wausau. I had been there since mid-June, and knew I was going to be leaving soon. Jerry had been my companion since early October, and he was a stud. We were working hard and making good progress. I could get into some stories about who we were working with and all that, but, I don't feel like it.
I had really recovered from whatever emotional trauma had trapped me for a couple months. I had for quite some time, I think, and was really in the high point of my mission. Jerry and I had a lot of opportunities to volunteer, either with the Hmong or doing more awesome stuff, like freezing our bums off for 2 or 3 hours singing carols in the parking garage of a mall in Wausau, WI for the Salvation Army. Sorry, long sentence. I was a missionary, so naturally my activities were very different than they are as a college student.
But the best part of that December was how much Christmas meant to me. Now, I know we criticize the commercialization of Christmas and all that, and we lose focus on the real meaning of the holiday. I suppose that's true. At the same time, Christmas has been perpetuated into a month-long event, culminating with a glorious December 25th. But this December was the best I'd ever had, and will be hard to beat. Christmas was everywhere for me, and I loved it.
I don't often discuss my religion in such a public place, so this feels a bit like going out on a limb for me. About a year into my mission, I decided I was really going to get strict on a couple rules that I felt were struggles for me. I decided I was only going to listen to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir or talks by general authorities of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (my church, for the slim possibility someone not of my faith is reading my blog). These were a bit stricter than the rules of my mission, but I wanted to be sure I was listening to the best things, the things that would help me be the best missionary I could be.
I think that might have driven Jerry Lo a bit crazy. I mean, I had like 3 or 5 MoTab CDs or something. Not many. But my parents sent me a Christmas CD at some point. I don't play Christmas music out of season, but that CD got a lot of plays that month. We lived about 15 miles outside of Wausau with some other missionaries at a member's home. It was awesome. Wausau is a very cold place, and very snowy. So we'd be done for the day at around 9, and we'd have this beautiful drive back home every night and listen to this music that was perfect for the situation. With all the other things we were doing, teaching and serving and volunteering, Christ became a really central part of the month in every way. I hadn't experience a Christmas season quite like that before.
This gets a bit scriptural right here. But it's Sunday, and I thought about this at church, so there's my justification. One thing that amazes me in the Book of Mormon is the people who had left the Holy Land, but still had tremendous faith in Christ. Something like 80% of the book takes place before the atonement of Christ, but they teach and believe as though it had already happened. I feel like it's so much easier now. We have the New Testament, and even non-Christians recognize the reality of Jesus Christ. But when I think of Christmas, I think of those people in the Book of Mormon, who are threatened with death because of their faith, and they wait for the sign of Christ's birth in the heavens. That's Christmas to me. I mean, presents are great, being home is lovely, I like the new family tradition of skiing/snowboarding on Christmas eve, but if one thing encapsulates all that Christmas means to me, it's that section of the Book of Mormon. For me, it puts the birth of Christ in context. We celebrate His birth every year, but we (rightfully) spend most of our time thinking about the ministry, teachings and atonement of Christ. Still, few things affect me more than the idea of these good people in the scriptures who are really put to the test, who really have to choose which side of the line to stand on. And that sign in the heavens signaled the life of the greatest man who ever lived, and spared the lives of the faithful Christians on the American continent.
So that's what Christmas was for me that year. It was this recurring thought that stayed with me every day, and when the 26th hit, the magic kind of felt lacking. But for 25 days of December, Christmas was this constant, invigorating thread. And it wasn't an easy month as far as missionary work goes. Lo and I had some difficult stuff fall apart with people we were teaching, and I still think about some of those people. But all the same, it was a great time. We really knew what drove us as missionaries, and the miracle of Christ's birth had never been so meaningful to me. I'm tremendously grateful for that.
I won't have the same opportunities I did 2 years ago. I was a full-time missionary, and my entire life was devoted to that (well, it was supposed to be). Now I'm spending my second December back home, trying to get ready for some exams that could easily kick my butt, and plenty of other distractions come and go. Last year I got to go back to Wisconsin and see a wonderful family right before Christmas, which I won't be able to do this year. Still, at church today, I was reminded of what this month means to me if I take a couple of minutes to think about it.
I hope everybody gets a chance to have Christmas worm its way into their hearts this December. It's an awesome holiday, and if we let the hustle and bustle of shopping derail it for us, that's our fault. I don't know what makes Christmas special for everybody. I know why I love it, and I'm glad it isn't some little 2-day event on the 24th and 25th that is easily forgotten. It's everywhere during December! I love it! Hope the Christmas season goes swimmingly for everyone this year.
